Permission to be grateful & still desire change

You can be grateful and still desire change


It happens, probably more times than I dare to admit. I find myself, comparing myself, with the many layers of my former self.

Then, without even recognizing I’ve done it, I begin to lose the joy I so tangibly felt the Lord give me. The immeasurable, unspeakable joy that seemed to overwhelm me, somehow quickly evaporates as immediate as the thought came and went.

But it makes me question, was it the thought that stole the joy or has the thought simply clouded my understanding of why I have the joy. (TRUTH BOMB: John10:10)

It’s like driving down the street and seeing things clearly in your front window and all of a sudden you drive into a patch of dense fog and humidity and your windows become smudged from both the inside and outside. It’s easy to assume that there is no way to see clearly until you hit that defrost button on the dashboard. Viola!! I can see clearly now.  This is what happens in the moment of a thought. We can actually hit that “defrost my mind” button called the Holy Spirit and literally have Him clear the way.  (1 Corinthians 13:10-12, Psalm 119:105)

Yesterday I asked God to clarify something that caused me to slightly lose my joy. Not completely lose it, but you know, one of those thoughts that made me sad. That’s a lie, it made me frustrated. It made me frustrated, then I started second guessing my own worth and then came the comparisons and then the fear, the bitterness, the resentment, the judgement, the this and the that and one thing after another I found myself upset with myself. All because of one tiny thought.

But here’s the thing friend, that thought is tiny enough to ruin you. It’s like a grain of sand in your shoe. Or a splinter in your palm. Or an eyelash in your eye, that you can’t find. Or the papercut… I think you get what I mean. (Galatians 5:7-9) 


“When I am consumed by my problems-stressed out about my life, my family, and my job-

I actually convey the belief that I think the circumstances are more important than God’s command to always rejoice.”
― Francis ChanCrazy Love: Overwhelmed by a Relentless God

Let’s talk about this frustration and what it’s doing to our spirit, soul and body.

FRUSTRA’TIONnoun The act of frustrating; disappointment; defeat; as the frustration of one’s attempt or design. (Source: Websters 1828 dictionary)

  1. the feeling of being upset or annoyed, especially because of inability to change or achieve something.
    “I sometimes feel like screaming with frustration”
    synonyms: exasperationannoyanceangervexationirritation;

    • an event or circumstance that causes one to have a feeling of frustration.
      plural noun: frustrations
      “the inherent frustrations of assembly line work”
    • the prevention of the progress, success, or fulfillment of something.
      “the frustration of their wishes”
      synonyms: thwarting, defeatprevention, foiling, blocking, spoiling, circumvention, forestalling, disappointmentderailment;

(Source: google definitions, frustration synonyms)

alllllrighty then…

Y’all… ok can we seriously just pause there and talk about this. What are we doing to ourselves? Frustration is prevention, blocking, derailing… (Galatians 5: You were running the race so well. Who has held you back from following the truth?) …man I could seriously list all of the physical implications of this havoc on our bodies. Not to mention, what’s happening in our bodies is a result of what’s happening in our minds and our choices. Oh goodness, y’all can we look at this connection to what’s coming out of our mouths?

Our words have tremendous power to either give life or snatch it. Friends, we cannot allow the enemy to gain so much territory in our minds. (Ephesians 4:25-28 New Living Translation)

So, yeah I’ll admit it. People frustrate me when I see their potential and they refuse to rise up to it. I get frustrated with myself when I realize the time wasters that are just flat out foolish.

Several weeks ago I attended a women’s leadership conference and had a million and one moments with the Holy Spirit where He kept nudging me reminding me that I was hearing truths He had been speaking to me all year. But that I hadn’t moved on what He had spoken to me because of fear, I’m gonna even suggest frustration. At the end of the conference I literally had no words to describe what happened. The next day the Lord told me it was an awakening. (Ephesians 5:14)

See my word for this year is ESTABLISH. Present tense. He told me that He was going to show me all the things that were in me that I doubted, questioned, wondered if they’d ever be used, and even ignored because I thought they were too much or not enough. All of the areas in my life where I kept disqualifying myself, this year He’s been reaffirming and redeeming. This revelation hasn’t been anything new, and it’s nothing unique to me. See God is in the business of reminding us who we are, in Him and He has one specific plan; that we would know that we are dearly loved by Him, perfectly. This perfect love removes all of that fear, doubt, questioning and wondering. The scarcity mindset of second guessing if we’ll be enough or have enough is blotted out when we recognize that we get to live and love others from the overflow of what He has freely given us. Go back and read Ephesians 4 then might I suggest that we park on James 3.

Job 22:28-30 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)

When you make a decision, it will be carried out, and light will shine on your ways. When others are humiliated and you say, “Lift them up,” God will save the humble. He will even rescue the guilty one, who will be rescued by the purity of your hands.


After the leadership conference I went on a personal development journey in an effort to clear out some mental clutter and came across the podcast of one of the speakers. I attempted to listen to one episode of her podcast but almost vomited on my own pride when I read the title. “Excuses That Steal Your Time”; almost immediately a word cloud response regurgitated from the pit of my stomach flooded with everything I thought I was doing productively. Y’all busy isn’t productive. Talking about our stuff isn’t progress. Rehashing old injuries isn’t beneficial.

1 Corinthians 10:23Amplified Bible, Classic Edition (AMPC)

All things are legitimate [permissible—and we are free to do anything we please], but not all things are helpful (expedient, profitable, and wholesome). All things are legitimate, but not all things are constructive [to character] and edifying [to spiritual life].

Desiring Change 


Half of the reason many of us struggle with body image and self esteem issues is because we only know how to do the work in our heads but we don’t know why we are worth more than just a number on the scale or our clothes so we keep learning more assuming more is better.

Well, more is not better, better is better. But again, I say, we must be mindful of whether we are just (head) learning it; do we know it in our hearts?

The REVELATION concerning WELLNESS is a heart issue. Go read Chapters 5 & 6. Those 2 chapters alone could teach a years worth of lessons!

My next Wellness Revelation small group begins in January, however if you’re interested in participating in a 7 day detox click here to sign up…


And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness. Don’t let anyone capture you with empty philosophies and high-sounding nonsense that come from human thinking and from the spiritual powers of this world, rather than from Christ. For in Christ lives all the fullness of God in a human body.

So don’t let anyone condemn you for what you eat or drink, or for not celebrating certain holy days or new moon ceremonies or Sabbaths.

Don’t let anyone condemn you by insisting on pious self-denial or the worship of angels, saying they have had visions about these things. Their sinful minds have made them proud, and they are not connected to Christ, the head of the body. For he holds the whole body together with its joints and ligaments, and it grows as God nourishes it. You have died with Christ, and he has set you free from the spiritual powers of this world. So why do you keep on following the rules of the world, such as, “Don’t handle! Don’t taste! Don’t touch!”? Such rules are mere human teachings about things that deteriorate as we use them. These rules may seem wise because they require strong devotion, pious self-denial, and severe bodily discipline. But they provide no help in conquering a person’s evil desires.”
‭‭Colossians‬ ‭2:6-9, 16, 18-23‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“When it’s hard and you are doubtful, give more.”
― Francis ChanCrazy Love: Overwhelmed by a Relentless God



Years ago I learned that change ain’t change until it’s changed. So, Let’s move.

Song: Live for the drop by Capital Kings

I don’t know about y’all but I’m over it. I’m done with just talkin about it, planning on it and not actually putting in the work. Are you ready to shift that frustration into FOCUS?

Download your readiness for change assessment today and let’s talk





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